The Power of Common Bond

How does strong healthy human interaction happen? What cultivates it? You probably come in close proximity of hundreds of different people everyday. Whether it's in the coffee shop, gas station, sidewalk, at the office, the restaurant, or online, human to human proximity happens daily. What causes two or more individuals to stop and interact? What causes us to create bullets in our planners that involve interaction? What separates an acquaintance from a friend? It's the common bond.

I have always felt that I have a gift of finding the common bond quickly. I'm borderline obsessed with it. When I meet someone new, I automatically go into a sort of friendly interrogation mode to find out if I share similar interests, mutual friends, if I've visited the city they live in, etc... The common bond can lead to the kind of conversation that goes beyond the surface. It can lead to a very memorable moment. It can begin a long lasting friendship. It can create a learning experience for both parties that otherwise never would’ve occurred if the common bond wasn’t established.

I feel that most of us have some sort of common bond that is just waiting to be revealed. Don't get me wrong here. Diversity is very important to community; however, humans by nature are more alike than we are different. If we emphasize the commonalities in our lives while respecting our diversity, we stand a better chance to whether storms that usually break us up.

Good leaders will always find and reveal the common bond in the people they are leading.

VERY SIMPLE EXAMPLE: I know that Person A likes to watch LOST, play basketball, read books, and eat steaks. I know that Person B is obsessed with coffee, collects antiques, likes to watch LOST, and is a vegetarian. On the surface, the obvious differences outweigh the similarity. However, if I get them together in on a conversation about last week's episode of LOST, there is an opportunity to find many other common viewpoints or interests that help the conversation reach a new level of depth. Not only that, but it also increases the chance to learn so much more from one another about topics outside each other's personal "norm".

Find the common bond you have with someone you consider an acquaintance. There is a good chance that person could quickly become your friend.